I’m sure you’ve all been in a situation where you’ve felt inferior or looked down upon. Wouldn’t it be nice if people made a conscious effort to not be so condemning all the time? I can recall many situations where I’ve opened up to “friends” only to be shut down. As soon as they hear about any mistake I’ve made, they start to develop this annoying self-righteous, holier-than-thou attitude. Maybe I’m crazy, but isn’t it obvious that when your seeking support, your looking for someone to be uplifting and supportive instead of condescending and judgmental? Admitting you’ve done something wrong and trying to change is hard enough without someone making you feel worthless.
The sad part is that this situation is a common occurrence. I have spoken to countless teenagers who have struggled with the hardships of growing up.
{Yes I said it, the hardships of growing up. I know that some of you might think that us teenagers have it easy, but the way the world works has changed a great deal since you were a teenager. Pop culture, along with mass media, have drastically changed our societies standards and morals over the past 50 years. Our generation has been desensitized to violence, death, drug and alcohol abuse, and many other subjects that were once sensitive issues. Also, the media has instilled in us this idea that pleasure is god, and that we are to live for the moment. Welcome to America, the hedonistic capital of the world. But that’s a rant for another day. ;)}
The tragedy behind this is that every story I’ve heard has the same thing in common. When the person sought support to change, they were looked down on and turned away by the people they trusted. They judged them based on what they had done. This reminds me of John 8:7…”He who is without sin among you, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.”
Come on people! What right do you have to judge someone, especially someone you supposedly care about? Oh thats right, you’ve never sinned before or done anything immoral or made a mistake. The reason they’re talking to you about it is because they thought you would be kind and accepting, standing by their side to support them. If you look up the definition of a friend, it says “one who gives assistance, a supporter. The word friend is also derived from the Old English freon, which means to love. Now I know this might offend some of you, but that really doesn’t matter. Don’t be selfish and let everything I’ve written be a waste of your time. If it offends you, then its obvious that your guilty of this in some way or another. I’ve done it before too, I haven’t met a person who hasn’t. It’s natural for us to act in this way, its inherent to human nature. But that doesn’t mean we have to act like that. It just means we need to make a conscious effort against acting like that.
So here is my challenge to you. The next time someone is opening up to you and seeking support, don’t shut them down. Keep an open mind, and remember to be a true friend. And don’t remind them how bad of a person they are, or how “holy” you are. Who knows what kind of change we could witness?